hi i'm back who cares.

hello children of the corn.
i've come out of hibernation and lived to tell my story to you. the main reason for my absence is rehearsing everyday for Bye Bye Birdie, which now happens to be completed and only a memory. it was a raging success worth all the time and effort. thanks to all you babies who came to support Teen Boy #5 in action. that chapter of my life is donzo.
between new years ever and BBBglory, i managed to get my driver's license. how???? i don't know. so far my trips on the road have been really awkward and involved speeding, rabbits running infront of my car, dead ends, caribbean music, people hiding in the backseat and wine. how long will it be before i'm arrested for DUI? i should start a countdown.
i left the country before i got to out of hand in Canada which didn't help anything. mexico doesn't ID me so i just disco'ed the night away with random bar hoppers and got asked by a fat native named Channelle to "go up to her room to get into some trouble" that's when i threw up on her chin hairs.
the next phase in Parkerlyfe is planning an insanely outrageous grad party, a huge deal for JW's considering birthdays and everything else on earth are out of the picture, Graduation Parties are beyond belief and mine needs to trump everyones...just because.
also, i eagerly anticipate hearing from BCIT to see if i've been accepted into college which would be nice to know i'm getting my life on track instead of blogging for a living and spending copious hours on facebook. if i don't end up accepted, then there are various different paths to choose from. main choice: moving to australia. i have familia there and i've decided i'm bored of living in vancouver. it would only be for 6 months of so. but it's looking like that's the official plan.
today was a horrible waste of a day and my time in which i could have been sleeping. i watched 2 terrible movies, death of a salesman and some french one where the only thing i enjoyed was the french sex scenes which were raunchy and hairy and awkward. mm.
it rained alot today and even snowed for because it was april fools. mother nature decided to be a fucking dyke and play a joke on everyone by snowing which is exactly why i want to kill her.
ANOTHER BIG PIECE OF NEWS: i've decided i'm going to be a teen father because it's on my list of things to do. i've been scouting possible mothers who i can hook up with, who wouldn't mind being my baby mama. i've got a few who are the finalists so expect a baby parkerlyfe sometime soon.
i also i'm trying to get arrested before the 18th bday. i wikipedia'ed ways to get arrested and none of them are working for me. UGHUHGUHSUGH.
my final goal this year is to make a series of best friends from all over the world just like Paris Hilton does. if she can why the fuck can't i?
Danilo is my Serbian Best Friend (SBF) that's been accomplished.
Brynne is my Italian Best Friend (IBF)
Crystal is my Danish Best Friend (DBF)
Danielle is my Scottish Best Friend (SBF)
Jason Z is my Greek Best Friend even though he's not greek (GBF)
Grandma is my Ukranian Best Friend (UBF)
and now i only have a few cities to go!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
now that my goals have been said and the general basis of my whereabouts the past 3 months, i'm off to feed my caged llamas.